Hostage Situation In Guatemala

I wrote this a few weeks ago, but unfortunately it still seems to apply. We're still waiting...
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Okay, so maybe the title is a little extreme. However, before you write this off as another silly rant from an antsy adoptive parent (at least a prospective one), hear me out.
If my child was a ‘hostage’ being held captive by someone else, I would have no difficulty in obtaining help from numerous different civil and government agencies. I’m sure I would have as much police and perhaps even FBI assistance as was needed to address the situation and bring my child home, especially if their whereabouts were clearly known.
Unfortunately, (as backwards as that is to say here), that is not my situation. I do know the exact whereabouts of my child, and have even been able to visit him there. Thanks be to God Almighty that he is safe and well cared for. I’m absolutely certain I would be driven into insanity if I had fears he were not. Nevertheless, I do feel he is being held captive. He is a captive to the process which is our Guatemalan adoption. However, you may feel in general about Guatemalan adoption, and some of the horrific tales our own government would like to share as the ‘norm’, it seems very clear based on all the info provided us to date that the birthmother is very aware of her situation, hasn’t been extravagantly compensated for this, and very much desires to continue with allowing this adoption. She has already had at least three official interviews requiring her to confirm this and may be subject to one more before she’ll then have to sign the final decree once it does become official.
Again though, our child remains captive.
We don’t have assistance really from any official entity. In fact, as I mentioned above, it seems of late our own Federal Department of State is quite in opposition to us. It almost seems they’d rather families right now ‘give up’ on Guatemala adoptions because there are a few cases of questionable circumstances. Last time I checked, there were unfortunately crimes, abuses, and misuses of authority all over the world and even in our beloved United States and our own government.
I guess the belief is that my child in Guatemala isn’t really my child legally. Legally that might be true. However, in my heart, he is definitely mine, just as our biological daughter is. I love him equally as much, and at this point, whatever may or may not happen with the adoption, I know who my first son is, and even if he never made it home, he would still always be mine and I would always long for him.
Before I digress too far with that though, let me explain why it really does feel like what I can only imagine a child being taken hostage must be like.
Right now, although I know where he is, I have no idea what our actual situation is. We seem to be lost in our process. We hear speculation about what may be or should be going on, but can never seem to find out anything specific and certainly not definite.
We sit by the phone or more often the computer, desparately waiting for any shred of news or hope, much like waiting on the next ransom demand for any glimmer of hope.
Again, like so many ransom demands, when we do get any piece of info, it is often filtered through many hands and so cryptic that we often can’t tell anything at all from it.
It would almost seem easier if we could just get a ransom note saying pay $XXXXXX and we’ll set him free.
But as you can probably figure out from at least knowing someone who adopted, we are already paying what to us is an extremely large amount of money, only to still have to suffer through this seemingly unending experience.
Like a hostage situation, especially if the whereabouts are known, most everyone ‘hopes’ and ‘thinks’ this process will eventually come to a positive end. However, no one is willing to say this with certainty. There are just too many unknowns for anyone who has any stake in the situation to guarantee that to us. It’s out of their hands almost as much as it’s out of ours.
Those at our agency, who I guess would be the closest parallel to our police in my imperfect analogy, are extremely cautious to ‘push too hard’ or make any demands or even place any expectations on the attorneys and officials for fear I guess of an adverse reaction.
Like hostage takers too, it seems the demands placed on us by the officials in this process are always changing. What the demand was yesterday isn’t good enough for today. Instead of three drops of blood in a smiley face pattern as your signature, today they’d like seven, arranged in a slight frown.
And again, don’t try to understand why, just do it. And then wait yet again for the ransom note, just hoping this might be the one that brings better news. You can attempt to contact them, but likely you won’t be able to. And if you do, you’ll likely just hear what you’ve heard over and over again before.
I realize this is extreme, but before judging an ‘antsy’ parent (someone related to our adoption was fond of using this term), think about it, and how you’d react if it were your child being held hostage. As I said, he is mine, whatever eventually happens and whatever the law may say. If you don’t think you’d be fighting every hour of every day for every possible bit of info and be extremely frustrated with anyone not willing to do anything to help, then I hope you never experience this. If you do think you would, then say a prayer for all adoptive families that you may or may not know. Some cases go quickly, but just as many if not more do not, and we’re stuck here waiting for that next ransom note…