There's a light at the end of the tunnel...

I can't see it at all yet... but it has to be there, right? Please say yes, even if you don't mean it. Seriously, though, I do believe somehow, someway, it will work out. It's such a hard road, such a test of faith in so many ways. Early on, so many people would say 'I just don't think I could do that (adopt)'. At the time, I often thought that sure they could. However, the past few days again I guess I realize it is a calling, and not one for everyone. For whatever reason, it is our calling though. There's no way I could quit now, as many times as I may want have wanted to, just because it all makes no sense.
I mean it really makes no sense. I see families on the forums we visit who make it home in just a matter of a few months. Even families from our own agency seem to be coming home in much less than a year. Yet here we are staring at 13 months since our referral with as I said, not even a hint of the light at the tunnel's end yet. Then I also see other friends on the forum who have even longer stories than ours. Please say a short prayer as you read this for: Lori P., LEIFJACKIE, BETELNUT, CLEMSUCH, ANGEL99. They've all waited a long time, too.

The hardest part for me still seems to be that no one can give me a hard and fast reason why our case drags on forever. We met with our agency again this week, and still, nothing. They continue to assure us of their confidence in our Guatemalan attorney. Yet, I still don't see results and don't see a strong indication he's in a hurry for results either. They seem to imply that the social worker is being problematic, but they really won't say how she's being that. I would think at this point if that was the case, they be past just 'implying' that, and just out and out say it. As I'm learning though, what I would think makes no difference whatsoever. What remains pretty obvious though, is that regardless of how many times we get the 'call everyday' if we need to speech, they're still not going to ask any more of the attorney than his regular biweekly updates, and if those don't come on schedule, they don't really seem willing to push him there either.

What stinks to me is that I think I've set it up in my mind that this may be the 'breakpoint' week. They've been working on this same piece for over 8 weeks now. It just seems like if they can't get it this week after I know they dropped off the report over a week ago, that not too much is going to change by time marching on. I'm not even sure myself what I think that means, but I know it scares me a little. Maybe it's good that what I think doesn't matter on this point...

Oh well, hope this finds everyone well, and that the week ahead proves promising. Thank you to everyone who reads this for being our support.